Typical family gathering.

Mom got grumpy and uptight because there were a lot of people in the house. She had to do everything, but not because we didn’t offer, more because she doesn’t trust anyone to do anything to her standards.

Even though she has serious health problems, and really shouldn’t be on her feet.

Still, Dad bears the brunt of her ire, and the rest of us just sit helplessly by and listen to her spew venom that she doesn’t really mean to a man that deserves none of it.

The little ones are oblivious, for the most part, and play incessantly, either on the old Nintendo NES in the bedroom (ah, those classic NES games…), or running about in the yard… with the podling who DOES know, but chooses to entertain the younger ones because it’s easier and gets her out of the line of fire. The older nephews read, or watch tv with the munchkins.

The rest of us (my brother, his wife and I) sit around and alternately try to be useful in the kitchen, or stay out of the way and talk… about… life. He’s a teacher. She’s a stay at home mom. I’m back in school. We all have our little anecdotes to share.

Snippet of conversation from the dinner table (please don’t ask how we got to this point):

Dad: Well, maybe you should get a cattle prod… that might work on those students. Those don’t leave a mark. (said jokingly)

Bro: Yeah… maybe…

9 yr old nephew: (unintelligible – mouth is full -, yet approving shout of agreement at this tacit threat of violence against someone)

me: Good idea, but you’ll probably want to test it out before you take it to work. (meaningful glance at nephew who shouts with his mouth full)

6 yr old niece: (much giggling) YEAH!

9 yr old nephew: (having now chewed and swallowed…somewhat): Not ME! Why don’t you use it on K (6 yr. old niece). SHE’s not the princess everyone says she is all the time!

6 yr old princess-niece: *I’M* a princess. (complete with fluttering lashes… not jokingly. This girl is serious.)

me: Oh, you keep working that, K. You’ve almost got it perfected.

6 yr old niece: (grinning… and believing me. She knows it. This child is going to be trouble in about 8 – 10 years.) I AM a princess!

Yeah, that’s the princess. She can’t help it. (Yet. She must reach an age of reason, first.) She’s the youngest child with 3 torturous older brothers. Give her a few years…

So after lunch (the main meal) the kids went out and sorta, kinda, raked leaves for Grandpa…

I’m not sure how efficient or effective they were, but it kept them busy, and I think it helped at least a little.

The afternoon and evening were spent just hanging out and talking. That was nice. After the evening grazing (nobody could handle a REAL meal at that point), we did the traditional playing of the cards. Sticking to rules, and not talking across the table are NOT really important during these games. It’s more an excuse for us all to be in the same room at one time, talking.

Oh, and the snacking.

Later we got to talk to the other bro in Montana… though mostly we all took turns talking to his oldest daughter. (7 years old) Now THAT is a child with the voice of an angel. I think it’s probably the sweetest little voice I’ve ever heard… and I’m partial to my podling. But this niece… she sounds like spun sugar being proferred by the most beautiful and delicate of fairy queens. Sweet child.

I need to find my way to Montana and visit that brother and his family. Of everyone I’m related to… he’s the one I miss the most. And, of course, he’s the one that managed to escape the farthest.

Someday.

All in all… well, it was a good day. They’re still family, and I still love them, no matter how dysfunctional our relationships have been over the years.

I’m pretty sure holidays are going to be weird for a while. The dust still hasn’t settled, and after the kind of upheaval the end of a marriage causes… I can’t expect it to.

At least they’re all still speaking to me, regardless of what a bad person they think I am.