This isn’t necessarily a bad thing… I’ve been saying I want to lose girth for months. (I haven’t really lost much ‘weight’ so much as ’roundness’.)

It’s just… well…

It seems a lot of things are shrinking, not just my waistline which seems to be reducing proportionally with the rest of me. This means I still do not resemble Sophia Loren OR Raquel Welch.

What it also means is… my feet are even smaller.

WHAT is going ON?

Either that, or shoe manufacturers are making smaller sizes larger… and my old shoes have REEEALLY stretched out.

And clothing is a problem. Now I’m wearing pants at least a full size smaller. Not complaining about that. Don’t mind that at all.

The PROBLEM lies in buying dresses. You see… my dress size has remained a full two sizes larger than my pants size. Why?

Because the one thing on me that is NOT shrinking is my chest. Ok, not really my chest, so much as my boobs. (No. I can’t really much complain about that either.) So… blouses must be larger, by at least two sizes, than my pants/skirts. I am now shaped like… um… a carrot. (And unless we’re using some sort of “dangle the carrot” metaphor… that’s not a good thing. Wait, even using that metaphor probably wouldn’t be a good thing. I don’t want to be dangled anywhere. Er… well… ok, no.)

Dress shopping is frustrating, because anything that fits the bust does NOT fit the waist. Everything looks like a tent. Anything meant to be form fitting results in all sorts of weird fabric baggage around the back, waist and hips, SOMEtimes while the buttonup bodice is STILL so tight that I have serious (and embarrassing) gappage at the placket.

Gappage at the placket. Scourge of the ladylike.

Now… these things could be dealt with by buying clothes and having them tailored, or just tailoring clothes to fit me.

‘cept… I don’t sew. And I’m broke, so I can’t pay someone to sew FOR me.

Woe to me.

I get what I wanted… and it’s ALSO a pain in the ass. And I’m still not skinny or curvy. Just… shrunken.

It is to sigh.