Swiped from Ms. Solitaire

Layer One: On the Outside
Name: Joy. Unconfined. Or… a more recently acquired moniker - Ms. Joie de Vivre
Birthday: July. My birthstone is the ruby, but I accept other gemstones nearly equally.
Current Location: I dwell in darkness… cozy place.
Eye Color: golden brown, I’m told.
Hair Color: auburn, because the henna, she makes it that way
Righty or Lefty: I’m… ALWAYS right, dahling
Zodiac Sign: I’m ALLLL Leo, baby. You may genuflect at will.

Layer Two: Just Below the Surface
Your Weakness: Flattery. Sh. Don’t tell anyone I’m a pushover for those who worship me.
Goal: Survival
Your Fears: Rejection. And heights. I don’t like to be up high. I don’t want to fall. And yeah, it feels like that rejection fear.

Layer Three: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Your thoughts first waking up: GODDAMNIT!
Your bedtime: Whenever I’m too sleepy to sit up anymore.
Your most missed memory: hmmm. I don’t know that I have one.

Layer Four: Your Pick
Pepsi or Coke: I tend to avoid the carbonated high fructose corn syrup beverages
McDonald’s or Burger King: Neither. I do not care for the fast food. I like real food.
Single or Group dates: Groups, because I don’t want to get closely involved with boys. Boys are bad juju.
Adidas or Nike: Neither. I like 4 inch heels.
Lipton Tea or Nestea: Neither. I prefer more aromatic and potent teas, thank you.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate. Dark. Bittersweet.
Cappuccino or Coffee: Tea, please. Thank you.

Layer Five: Do You?
Smoke: never
Have a crush: a few
Think you’ve been in love: repeatedly
Want to get married: never again
Believe in yourself: not at all
Think you’re a health freak: No. I’m too self-indulgent. I enjoy the pleasures of life too much to deny myself anything, though I do try to strive for balance.

Layer Six: In the Past Month
Drank alcohol: A bit last night.
Gone to the mall: Yes. The podling had to have the Lucky dragon t-shirt
Eaten Sushi: Yes. At Jag’s birthday party. And it was good.
Gone skating: No, the last time I put me feet on a roll-y thing, I severely jacked up my right arm and it still hasn’t completely recovered.
Dyed your hair: Yes. It requires most of a day to accomplish. Every month it’s my “sit at home with mud on my head and watch movies” day.

Layer Seven: Have You Ever?
Played a stripping game: Game? No.
Gotten beaten up: Never physically. In the last 2 years I have been emotionally pummeled and destroyed. Repeatedly.
Changed who you were to fit in: I did. I’ve stopped. It is good.

Layer Eight: Getting Old
Age you’re hoping to be married: Been there, done that, wore the suburban mommy khakis and polo shirt. All done now.
Plastic Surgery or Wrap: If I had the money, I wouldn’t be averse to a little lift, a little smoothing, but nothing too artificial. I’d like to grow old at least SOMEwhat gracefully.
Buried or Cremated: I don’t care. I’ll be dead. Dispose of my carcass as economically and cleanly as possible.

Layer Nine: Perfect Mate
Best Eye Color: Doesn’t matter, as long as there is depth behind them
Best Hair Color: I am partial to dark hair.
Short or Long Hair: I don’t care, as long as he has a some sense of style… and no, I don’t mean perfectly coiffed. Just… nice.

Layer Ten: What were you doing…
1 HOUR AGO: taking podling to pick up her books so she could do her homework
1 WEEK AGO: something similar
1 MONTH AGO: I don’t know, but I’m sure it was insignificant if I don’t remember it.
1 YEAR AGO: Living in absolute emotional hell.

Layer Eleven: Finish the Sentence
I LOVE: but it is not valued.
I HATE: rarely, but searingly when I do.
I HIDE: what I really feel.
I MISS: being valued.
I NEED: but I will never have.

At least… that’s the rule.

It’s a stupid rule.

What do you think?

So I’m taking these burlesque classes. Last week’s assignment was to find a song. I have the song.

Now… if you’ve ever seen a burlesque performance, the best and most fun of them all have a ‘theme’ that dictates the costuming and the character portrayed by the dancer.

Here’s an example or two.

I’m having trouble coming up with something to portray. I love my song, it’s the right length, it’s got enough bounce, but with enough dynamic slow bits to make for interesting pauses and such…

I just need a character.

SO… this is the part where I need help, and the part where there might be something in it for you.

Put your suggestions for a character to dance, and any costuming ideas, or ‘mini-story’ ideas for the song in the comments for this post. If your suggestion is what I choose to use… then when I eventually dance this locally, I’ll make sure you get free admission to the show. (Even if I have to pay for it myself.)

This accomplishes a few things. 1. I get a bunch of ideas for the theme for this bit. (And maybe ideas for future themes.) 2. If I choose one (which I probably will because I’m too lazy to come up with my own) I have committed myself to making sure there is a show locally. 3. I will also have committed myself to performing in said show rather than just standing on the sidelines while facilitating it. 4. You get a free show, of more than just me, since if there IS a show, there will be at least one other person in it. Perhaps more.

As I see it… win-win (and win, and win).

So here’s the song, Really Wanted You by Emmit Rhodes. Give it a listen, free your mind, and help me come up with a fun and cute, or alternately saucy and smoldering, character to don while performing the tease.

These are the lyrics, in case that matters to you:

Billy knocked two teeth out

Got five stitches in the chin

I was dying inside babe

I don’t mind the pain

When I needed someone

Tell me who came along

I was hoping you’d come

Cause I really wanted you

Yes I really wanted you

I was sleepless till dawn

With a heart breaking down

I’ve been lonely too long

Cause I really wanted you

Yes I really wanted you

Billy knocked two teeth out

Got five stitches in the chin

I was dying inside babe

I don’t mind the pain

Well the moon starts to yawn

With every morning sun

Now the darkness is gone

Cause I really wanted you

Yes I really wanted you for so long

…and have so little to show for it.

Hm.

I really have been doing things. Here’s the rundown.

Thursday

Thursday evening I was invited to have dinner at Oggi, the Italian place on Van Ness just South of Olive in the Tower. I accepted. Along with some very entertaining dinner conversation, there was also good food. Here’s what I ate, and a mini-review. The appetizer was “tubes and tentacles”, but on the menu I think they called it something along the lines of fried calamari. It arrived in a huge bowl, plenty of calamari for two people, and it was quite tasty with the accompanying sauce. For my entree I chose the meat lasagna. I have to say it was good, certainly good enough. I didn’t think it had enough of the “meat” part of the equation. The texture was nice (sans enough meaty goodness). I think it could have had a bit more tomato pizazz added to the flavor. Still, I ate the whole thing, so it couldn’t have been too bad. Dessert was shared, and just on a whim, we chose to order the chocolate raviolis. After all, when you see THAT on the menu, don’t just wonder? I did. So we ordered it.

This is what it looked like upon arrival, giving us pause:

Okay. So… yeah, they’re raviolis, made of chocolate flavored pasta. Inside was a chocolate creme filling, and they were served in a soupy sauce of what appeared to be raspberries and blueberries. (There may have been a boysenberry or two, I don’t recall.) The pasta was a bit al dente and not at all the nice, slick texture I usually associate with a ravioli of any sort. The filling was delightfully sweet and light, with a lovely chocolate flavor. The sauce/soup was like a thin berry syrup with fresh berries, that part was also great. For some reason, though, the mixture of these three things left something to be desired. I think having to chew through a tough ravioli that is only marginally cocoa flavored, but mostly bland, to get to the good stuff, and then only getting that little taste of the good stuff, was just too much, even if it WAS bathed in berry goodness.

This is what the plate looked like after dessert was consumed:

The comment was made that it resembled the remains of a slaughter.

Edible, but definitely not a dessert I will order again. It just didn’t deliver. Even less than my lasagna did. I’m still glad we ordered it. You just don’t see chocolate pasta drowning in berries all that often. Now I can say I’ve tried it.

So, my final review of the place: Oggi is a lovely restaurant. The atmosphere is pleasant. The service is superb. We were well cared for throughout the experience. As for the food… I’m told the chicken marsala was quite good. My lasagna was good, just not enough for my picky tastes. The appetizer of calamari was very tasty. The dessert was barely passing as desserts go, but still a FUN experience.

I would recommend Oggi. You get plenty of food, and by and large the food is good. Just… only order the chocolate raviolis if you’re looking for the experience and not exciting flavor.

After dinner was a trip downtown to Broadway Studios for a late night Art Hop look at what was going on there. As always, a wide variety of art to see, and people out and about, even at that hour. I had the pleasure of being introduced to local artist and filmmaker Teresa Flores, whose film that was playing during Art Hop happens to be titled “Joy”. (It has nothing to do with me, but from what I hear it is a thoughtful film and worth seeing.) I just enjoy these little congruities of life.

Later we dropped by Starline Grill for a drink, then because the evening was so pleasant, as only a temperate spring evening in Fresno can be, we wandered around the block. Heading back down Wishon toward Olive we passed the knitty-people-yarn-wool-store-place. (I forget the name of it, but it’s one of those shops where you can go buy interesting yarns with which to make interesting things, and see interesting things that have been made with interesting yarns.)

We saw a creature in the window. At the time it was referred to as “sheep like creature”. I have since decided it is a sheep-duck… a sh’duck… a shuck, or deep… OR… a very tall platypus in winter coat.

Whatever it is, this is what it looks like:

Friday

Full Circle Brewery celebrated eight years of making great stuff to drink, even having a birthday cake and horse ovaries (or hor d’ouevres) for the occasion. Suicide Lounge played for the party. I had so much fun. I’m feeling more and more comfortable on stage, and I think it shows in my singing. It flows much more easily, and I can put a great deal more of what I feel into my interpretations. We do so many songs that speak directly from my heart. No photos, the pictures that were taken by a friend didn’t turn out at all, so… oh well.

After that, several of us congregated at Starline Grill for late night snacking and chatting. It was fun.

Saturday Spent most of Saturday sleeping, but managed to rouse myself in time to go downtown with lecram to Milano on the Fulton Mall.

The evening was kicked off with some fantastic original music from Poplord. I took a few photos at first (this is the only usable one):

Then I didn’t remember to take any more because I was enjoying the music too much. After Poplord was an encore performance of Sprawlzilla vs. Mainstreet. I’ve seen it before, but it was entirely enjoyable a second time. Timely, clever, and enormously entertaining. I couldn’t stay for the music of Docabilly, because I had to get up EARLY in the morning.

Sunday

Because every week, LJ and I are taking a burlesque class to learn the art of the tease. So far… it’s fabulous fun. I can’t wait to get a chance to actually see one of the shows hosted by our teacher, and the only award winning filmmaker who is also an award winning burlesque artist, Penny Starr Jr.

If you’re ever in the L.A. area, check out the Victory Variety Hour. I’m going to find a way. It looks like so much fun!

After class, we found ourselves in an enormous shoe store. Surprisingly, there weren’t too many shoes that struck my fancy, but I did find one pair that wanted to come home with me.

Then we journeyed off to the ORIGINAL Original Tommy’s for a chili cheesburger, where we stood up and ate, just like everyone else has done there for decades. After that was a jaunt down to Olvera Street to wander the stalls.

By this point I was exhausted, but LJ had a specific errand in mind that needed to be accomplished. So I found myself at Frederick’s of Hollywood, staring at a sheer, net-like apparatus that is probably pretty hot on a skinny waif of a woman, but that I knew would fail my ample bosom miserably. I did find a few other things on which I might be able to base some fun costume-y things with very liberal application of shinies, sparkles and fringe.

And… I ended up with a lovely emerald green corset. Because it also wanted DESPERATELY to come home with me. It’s not like my other corsets as it’s one of the mass-produced, somewhat more cheaply constructed types. This is actually a good thing, because it moves with me, and I’ll likely be able to sing in it. (Which I fully intend to do.)

So… that’s my weekend.

Body:
[X] You know how to make a pot of coffee **(Yes, I’m that old.)**
[ ] You keep track of dates using a calendar **(I keep track of dates using an iphone)**
[x ] You own more than one credit card **(Sad. Very sad.)**
[ ] You know how to change the oil in a car **(No, but I should probably learn.)**
[X] You’ve done your own laundry **(Daily, for more years than I can remember)**
[ ] You vote in every election
[X] You can cook for yourself **(It’s not exciting, but yes, I can cook)**
[ ] You think politics are exciting

TOTAL SO FAR: 4

[ ]You show up for school/college/work every day early **(school/college, no - work, on time… you see, if I’m paying, I do what I want, if I’m getting paid, I do what they want)**
[ ] You always carry a pen in your bag/purse/pocket
[x] You’ve never gotten a detention **(I’m a good girl, I am)**
[ ] You have forgotten your own birthday at least once
[X] You like to take walks by yourself/or with 1 other person **(walking = good)**
[X] You’ve watched talk shows **(who hasn’t? sometimes they’re like train wrecks, can’t look away)**
[X] You know what ‘credibility’ means without looking it up **(this… is not a hard word. my kid knew that when she was about 8)**
[X] You drink coffee at least once a week (or tea), **(yes, tea)**

TOTAL SO FAR: 9

[X] You know how to do the dishes **(What kind of lazy asses take these quizzy things??)**
[X] You can count to 10 in another language **(I learnt it wen I wuz in furst grayd)**
[X] When you say you’re going to do something you do it… **(Much to my detriment, it seems. Not everyone is so reliable in return. Especially boys.)**
[X] Your parent(s) trust you **(I think they do, anyway)**
[X] You can mow the lawn **(But now I don’t have to. YAY APARTMENTS!)**
[X] You can make adults laugh without being stupid **(At least, they do laugh when I’m witty. Maybe they’re just being nice. Hm, now I’m going wonder…)**
[ ] You remember to water the plants **(I kill plants just by being near them)**
[X] You study when you HAVE to **(Because, why study any other time?)**
[ ] You pay attention at school/college/work. **(When it’s important, I do. The rest of the time I just keep my head down and get what I need to done.)**
[ ] You remember to feed your pets.. **(Don’t have any, and this is why)**

TOTAL SO FAR: 16

[ x] You can spell ‘experience’ without looking it up **(I could spell experience when I was about 6 or 7)**
[ ] You work out on a regular basis **(Life is too short)**
[ ] The people at Starbucks know you by name **(Not fond of Starbucks. Too many creamy things, not enough flavory things)**
[ ] Your favorite kind of food is take out **(No, because take out generally doesn’t like me. It’s unkind to my entrails.)**
[ ] The first thing you do when you wake up is get caffeine **(The first thing I do when I wake up is curse.)**
[ ]You can go to the store without getting something you don’t need **(Anything at the store is probably something I don’t need)**
[ ] You understand political jokes the first time they are said **(I probably could if I tried, but… why?)**
[X] You can type quickly

TOTAL SO FAR: 18

[X] You have realized that the weather forecast changes every hour **(Except in July and August, and then the weather forecast is always “FUCKING HOT”)**
[ ]Your only friends are from your place of employment
[X] (moms) you have been to a Tupperware party **(and several other kinds of party, and I’m still not sure why, except as an excuse to socialize with other women who have no more in their lives than I did at the time. No such parties for me these days, unless they’re… well… nevermind.)**
[X] You have realized that no adult will take you seriously unless you are over the age of 25 and have a job **(This is true. Especially about that job thing. I still don’t have one. People don’t take me seriously. I’m such a slacker!)**
[X] You have more bills than you can pay **(And probably will until I drop dead.)**
[ ] Most of your friends are older than you & are married. **(Older, yes, married… not so much)**
[X] You can say no to staying out all night **(I can. I must, really, or I’d fall asleep in the middle of festivities. And that’s just such a mood killer.)**
[X] You use the internet every day **(How can I not?)**
[ ] Your wardrobe hasn’t changed in a while **(My wardrobe changes all the time. I can’t make up my mind.)**
[X] You can read a book and actually finish it **(I can. Sometimes it takes a while because I read several books simultaneously, and pick them up depending on my mood.)**

TOTAL ADDED UP: 25

The total is the age you will marry
Add up all the x’s and title subject with the sum as “My marriage age is__”

Ok. See, that’s funny, because I was married when I was 22. Divorced at 38. Probably will never marry again with the way things look.

The only possible candidate gives indications that it isn’t up to the task.

Yay for a lifetime of lack of fulfillment and celibacy.

These are NOT all related.

What an interesting story if they were.

But no.

On learning a new skill:

I can now light a match from a matchbook with one hand. I feel so very accomplished in my new ability. This is what comes of socializing with people who smoke like chimneys.

Popping lecram’s cherry:

He popped his platinum cherry. I made him sign for it.

Ok, bartender-Katie did, but still. I was there. I helped.

The Ingrid Bergman:

The first flower I’ve been given in a long time. She’s lovely.

Pet peeve #144:

Because I’ve used #143 many times. It makes me think of my Diana. So… #144. And I think it’s quite the “gross” error, anyway.

The peeve - When people caption photos of themselves with another individual as “Jimmy-Joe-Bob and I”. No, No, NO! It’s “Jimmy-Joe-Bob and ME”. It would ONLY be “Jimmy-Joe-Bob and I…” IF it were followed by “…were in the tandem nose-picking contest” in the description. Otherwise, this is a photo of “Jimmy-Joe-Bob and ME”.

Damn it.

What I did over the weekend:

Friday -

A trip to the park with a podling and her kite. Not enough wind for flying her rather heavy dragon kite, so after a few attempts at keeping it aloft we settled for playing in the grass and wandering.

I have a podling. It is also part monkey. It climbs trees.

It wanted to climb this one as well.

I said no. I just took a picture of the pretty flowers instead.

A good day.

That evening we accompanied lecram to see Theatre Ventoux’s production of Lear. I enjoyed it, but I think it is telling when an extremely intelligent 13 year old says “I THINK I got the gist, but I’m not exactly sure what I just saw…” then has to read the notes in the program to really flesh out the story. It is, however, worth seeing, especially if you’re familiar with Shakespeare’s King Lear. It’s a refreshing take and an intimate, spare staging.

Saturday -

Being incredibly lazy with a podling, watching episode after episode of Penn and Teller’s Bullshit. (Because the podling has become quite fond of this series. I do have a pretty cool podling.)

The evening found us at L’s. Podling was quite adept at entertaining her ‘boyfriend’ (L’s young boy-child, who is eight years younger than podling. He has publicly claimed her and by his own admission, has 3 girlfriends. As it stands now. Of differing ages. He’s a gemini.) She kept him occupied while the adults played with fire. I managed to NOT hit myself in the head with a flaming staff. Even managed a few tricks and low tosses. Yay me?

Sunday - Up at 5 a.m. In the car by 6:30 a.m. on the way to So Cal for the first in a series of weekly burlesque classes. LJ and I have decided that we are glad we decided to do this insane thing. We like the teachers, both very talented and experienced burlesque dancers. It’s fun. We learned just a tiny bit of a choreography already, and it feels… well… right. For me, at least. Yay! I learn how to take my clothes off in front of people and be alluring while doing it!

Interestingly, the studio where the classes are held is literally a block or so away from the Hollywood Walk of Fame, the Chinese Theatre, the Kodak Theatre (where they do the Oscars) and all that other mess of touristy stuff. We wandered through briefly after class looking for food. On the way home we went to Lancaster and looked at the Poppy Reserve. Golden hillsides of wild poppies. I have pictures, but I’m too tired to find my camera and download the photos. (The earlier photos came off my phone which sits right next to me as I type. Maybe I’ll feel industrious tomorrow and add the poppy pics.) Future trips will probably involve sightseeing, finding interesting places to shop and maybe taking in a bit of culture.

Monday - (Yes, I know Monday isn’t weekend, but still…)

Spent the evening in the company of friends and acquaintances. How cool is it that I can sit around with REAL writers and talk about the difference between forcing theme and ‘the point’ of a story, and having the idea then letting the theme and ‘point’ take shape as it evolves.

May have a gig writing some copy for… a business… and I’m getting pointers and advice from one of these real writerly sorts!

I’m not sure why this puts such a smile on my face. I think it has something to do with the idea of getting paid to do something that I don’t think I’ll mind all that much. (But that may just be because it’s novel to me. After doing it a few times, I’ll probably be jaded and hate it as much as all the other things I’ve learned to do just well enough to get by.)

There we are.
Past bedtime.

Edit - Adding poppy pics. Yay.

It was FREAKING windy and cold, so all the little flowers were curled up.

And then this next flower, we learned at the Poppy Reserve Visitor Center, is called a “blue dick”. (Which is much better than the name that our mothers called it by when we were growing up. It’s a VERY non-pc name, so I won’t type it here. But “blue dick”, while it could be construed as slightly off-color by some, at least makes some sense. The other name didn’t even make any sense.)