(I’ll bet this guy would agree with me…)

I was originally going to post the following as a comment on this post in the Fresno Beehive, but it got too long, so decided to sound off here in my private corner.

Mother Earth dying…

Um. Not really.

She goes through cooling and warming trends over the millenia, and what’s happening now is no different than what has been happening for millions of years.

When there weren’t as many people on the rock with all their huge cities and instant communications, these sorts of things weren’t globally noticed. But now we know instantly when there’s tidal surge on the other side of the world. This stuff happens.

Then Algore finishes “inventing the internet”, and decides to invent a new emotional global crisis as well. And gets awards he doesn’t deserve for something that isn’t accurate, when other people who have contributed far more to humankind (especially in peace AND entertainment) than he has are ignored.

And then people run around screaming “the sky is falling, the sky is falling”, and see portents of doom in natural climate changes. Because Algore ghost wrote a book and made a movie.

Mother Earth is not dying. She’s just doing what she does. She’s moving air and water and earth all over herself as she always has, in response to lunar and solar influence. Because those heavenly bodies move in cycles as well.

The puny humans crawling all over the earth just have to learn to deal with it. Adapt. That’s what we did to get where we are. But suddenly, now, we think we can halt the inevitable, and natural, shift of climate, and keep the climate right where we want it to stay.

And THAT is a bad idea, one… because it wouldn’t be healthy for “mother earth” to do that, and two… because it won’t work anyway. (I’m not saying that gives us leave to toss our styrofoam cups in the ocean. Don’t get me wrong.) We’re better off making efforts to find ways to adapt to what HAS happened and IS happening, and finding ways to reduce our petroleum dependence for fuel. Petroleum has many other uses that can’t be ignored, but when we have viable alternatives for fuel, why are we not using them where it makes sense?

The earth will not die. Various species might; and if people don’t figure out how to live efficiently, the human species might, but the earth… it will still be here (provided we don’t blow it up because of the inability for world leaders to get their heads out of their collective asses and realize THE PEOPLE don’t give a shit about global dominance… we just want to be able to feed our kids, and enjoy our lives).

Earth will still be here, moving air and water and dirt all over itself.

Mother Earth is not dying. But people are. Let’s focus on the people, hey?

(For the record, I do not see the planet as a female entity. It’s a planet. A rock in space with stuff on it. The whole “she” thing is just a response to the title of the Beehive post.)

Addendum:

Thanks for the link to that, Steve.

And where, oh where, is MY Charlton Heston?
Sigh.

Years have gone by, and many folks are still enamored of this television phenomenon called “Lost”.

I never watched it. It didn’t seem like something I would really be into. But many have found it to be a source of great dramatic entertainment. Rehearsals were cut short so the latest installment would not be missed. Discussions of it were couched in tones of awe and wonder. I was never quite curious enough, and besides, I don’t like to watch things when I haven’t seen the beginning.

Finally, season 1 is available to watch instantly on Netflix. I decided to see what all the flap is about.

Apparently, nothing.

I’ve watched episode 1. It made me laugh. But I’m giving it a chance. Episode 2 is running, and it’s not giving me much, either.

It’s just like when I read a book. If it doesn’t grab me within a few pages, odds are that I won’t finish it.

Lost has only a few more pages to go to grab me.

Why am I not seeing what so many other people seem to see?

Trying to get my blog to post to Facebook as well… let’s see if this works!

Letterman is a douche bag. Or, at least, he’s a moron that doesn’t preview the jokes prepared by douchebag writers. He’s consistently crotchety, cranky, rude, crass, and not at all respectful toward women. But he doesn’t need to lose his job over it.

Sarah Palin needs to learn to be ABOVE this kind of inflammatory nonsense. A simple, “I am disappointed that such a well-known funny man would so recklessly risk being identified as finding statutory rape and abuse of a teen as a source of comedy. It is not funny, nor is open misogyny.” would suffice.

And that should be that.

But instead, we have calls for his being fired.

That’s like insisting that a private citizen who donated to the Prop 8 campaign be fired from his job because of his personal moral beliefs. Just because someone believes and supports something others don’t agree with does NOT mean they should lose a job over it unless it is directly interfering with that person’s ability to perform job duties.

David Letterman is sometimes amusing, sometimes not. I don’t find it funny when a person disparages a woman for being a woman. Sarah Palin is not everyone’s favorite political figure. There are folks who didn’t vote for McCain simply because they didn’t like HER, even though they were ok with him. So America has already shown its preference.

This is what makes her an easy target for hack writers who can’t find anything better to make jokes about. So what if she was in New York? Why call attention to it? Because you need attention to make a showing against a competing network late night talk show that’s got new and interesting things going on. It’s just a cheap shot.

That’s ALL late night talk show jokes are about. They’re cheap shots. Some are just classier about it than others.

So let’s treat it like that’s what it is. Express disappointment. Boycott advertisers if you wish. I unknowingly boycott 99% of those advertisers because I’m jobless, can’t pay my bills as they are, and have no money to not support them with ANYway. I have far bigger things to worry about than David Letterman behaving rudely.

Don’t say the man should be fired. Just let him be the same crass-tastic jerk he’s always been on television.

And leave Sarah Palin out of the news. For heaven’s sake. Let the woman go see a ball game with her family if she wants! If she starts running for office again… then she’s fair game, and knows that’s the price you pay for being in the public eye. Until then, let her quietly be the middle class governor of Alaska who is NOT our current vice president.

Alaskans might care about her antics in New York, but really… the rest of us don’t. And she’s not funny. Her young daughters are not funny. And no, she does NOT look like a slutty stewardess, no matter how much you might LIKE her to be one in your fantasies.

Which brings me to another point. I could write pages and pages on the way women who have run for political office are portrayed. Chicks on all sides of the political spectrum are portrayed alternately as cold-hearted, bitchy, and sexless, or brainless, slutty and irrelevant; none of which ANY of the women who have made it to ANY political office are. There is no happy medium for a woman. If you prove efficient and determined, you’re a calculating bitch. Yet if you show you have a heart and feelings, you’re too emotional. If you exhibit a sense of personal style and grooming, you’re slutty or trying too hard, or calling undue attention to your femininity when you should be paying attention to the issues at hand. But if you don’t make an attempt at being attractive, then you’re not a real woman, and you’re clearly too cold and heartless to be a good person.

You can’t win, ladies. And you have to be FAR stronger than any man to soldier on.

And God forbid you have a family. If you do, expect them to be dragged into the muck right along with you.

No, the only woman who stands a chance in the world of governance is a woman who HAS demonstrated that she has a heart, but has clearly sacrificed all for her public alone, and no longer has personal impediments to distract her from caring for the public and the job at hand. She must have been human, but have moved on to a saintly aloofness. She must be visibly touched, but remain untouchable. Jibes at her personal life or her past must be utterly beyond her concern, while she is only openly concerned about others, and their plight. And it ALL has to be utterly honest and genuine. The public can smell insincerity from across the globe.

The woman who would be a public servant must truly sacrifice herself entirely in service to the public. No man ever has to sacrifice as much to hold office as a woman does. And I honestly think THIS is why we still have not had a woman president. No woman can be both sexless and sexy, cold and warm-hearted, innocent and beyond reproach, yet knowledgeable and savvy all at once. If she is appreciated for her femininity, she is not completely respected as a leader. If she is respected as a leader, she is not completely appreciated as a woman. Our society demands that women be either one or the other entirely, and still can not handle the fact that many (most) women have the innate capacity for all of these things combined.

I’m not saying it’s right. I’m just saying that’s the way it is, even in our so-called modern and enlightened society.

Slagsmålsklubben – Sponsored by destiny from Tomas Nilsson on Vimeo.

I haven’t blogged in far too long. So here’s the update.

I still need a job. Anybody have one for me?

I’m still alive. Busy as heck, but that’s only because I’m so focused on STAYING alive that I’m doing almost anything for a buck. I’d rather have a real job. It makes life so much more serene.

Anybody want me to ghost-blog, or ghost-tweet for them? I’m for hire.

Podling is well. Horrid child gets to go to Disneyland without me. Kidding. She’s not horrid, just bloody lucky. I want her to have the most wonderful time.

Off to Marhaba at Full Circle tonight. Come say hi to me, I’m working the door. The music promises to be good. Looking forward to it.

I’ll blog for real soon. I will. You’ll see.

Because I still have nothing worthwhile to say. I know, it’s so BORING when people do these as blog posts.

So far in 2009…

Have you had a girlfriend or boyfriend?
Nope.

Have you had your birthday?
Not until July.

Been to church?
Nope.

Cried yet?
Mercifully, no. I’ve cried far too much over the past few years. I think I’m now too numb to feel enough to cry.

Had someone close to you pass away?
Not this year. Please no, not this year.

Pulled an all-nighter?
No. I need my sleep these days.

Drank Starbucks?
Umm… I don’t think so. Not this year.

Gone shopping?
Yes. With the pod. Things were purchased. Mostly for her. She’s a young lady now, you know.

Gone to the movies?
Probably?

Been to the beach?
Nope.

Bought something for over 100 dollars?
Nope. I am the broke. So… so… very… broke.

Met someone new?
I’m constantly meeting new people, and can never remember their names the next time I see them, and feel so horrible because they apparently know me and I’m staring blankly and smiling… It’s tragic.

Been out of your home state?
Not this year. Not least year, either. Maybe I’ll never leave again. This is likely.

Gone snowboarding/skiing?
Nope. I don’t do things that could break bones. Not since the Skateboarding Incident of Thanksgiving 07.

In The Past Month…

Kissed someone?
No. Nobody loves me who qualifies for such an honor.

Slept in a friend’s bed?
Nope.

Snuck someone over?
What are we? 12?

Snuck out of your own house?
Why would I do this? To fool myself? I live alone.

Been in a bar?
Yah. Sung in a bar, eaten in a bar, had meetings in a bar, hung out with friends in a bar…

Gotten a car?
I WISH! But Violet, she’s a trooper and still runs, and we love her.

Gone over your cell phone minutes?
At this point I don’t think this is possible. People don’t love me enough to talk to me long enough to use up my cell phone minutes.

Been called a whore/bitch/skank/slut?
Yes. And I never appreciate it. Ever. Not. Ever. I hate it.

Drove somewhere?
Yes. I have to drive to get ANYwhere.

Done something you regret?
I don’t regret things.

Gotten caught…?
Doing what? The things I do, I do with full intention. If someone “catches” me doing something, it’s something THEY don’t like, but I’m ok with.

Lasts…

Thing you bought?
Body wash for the shower.

Person to call you?
RP. About rehearsal.

When was the last time you felt stupid?
Oh, that’s a daily occurrence. I’m just a big dork.

The last time you felt worried?
Right now. Money. As in, I have none, and there are a LOT of people who want it from me, but I’ve none to give, and I’d like to give them what they want, but I can’t. Not yet.

When was the last time you walked/ran over a few miles?
Not recently enough. I enjoy walking and need to do it more.

Who was the last person who saw you cry?
hmmm. Not sure. Might have been CH… because I very rarely allow myself to be seen crying.

Who was the last person who made you cry?
I know who it was. You don’t need to know.

Who was the last person you watched a movie with?
The podling and a roomful of her teenage friends who were there for her birthday sleepover.

Who was the last person you danced with?
I… don’t remember. I think it was a bunch of ladies. Who are learning to take their clothes off on stage.

Who did you last yell at?
I don’t yell at people. I get gravely quiet. If I yelled I’d blow off steam and things would be alright. Instead, I get very, very serious. And then I could be dangerous.

Who last told you they loved you?
The sweet podling, because she’s the only person on earth who really DOES truly love me.

She is fond of ice cream, chocolate, cheese and many greasy foods.

She’s very pushy.

And I am fat because of her. Which feeds her.

So there are more grilled cheese sammiches.

And trips to the freezer for a few spoonfuls of french vanilla.

And I’m out of chocolate.

You see, I get these emails from “RealAge” these days. I once took one of those “How old is your body in relation to your chronological age?” tests. Supposedly the test has behind it all the expertise and knowledge of Drs. Oz and Roizen. (I think I spelled that properly…) I used to take those little questionnaires and come out with a “real” age of several years younger than I am. Now… I’m a few years older. I have a sneaking suspicion it has something to do with the change in my answers about whether I am happily coupled, gainfully employed or have a reliable income, and the amount of stress in my life, since those are the ONLY things that have changed in the last five years.

Right, so since I took this test and found out I am fading, and fast, I’m now on a mailing list that sends me cheery, helpful, encouraging reminders of that very fact. I must eat certain foods to help slow down this nasty aging process. I must do certain exercises to strengthen my core muscles. (Ok, I’ll admit to that. I have the worst posture in the world which results in giving the appearance that I have 3 chins, and I may be chubby, but I’m not THAT chubby.) And I must walk. Daily. For at least 30 minutes.

So… as I sit here in the morning, gnawing on my grapefruit sweetened with stevia and munching a handful of walnuts, I am actually CONTEMPLATING this concept of walking. Just to walk. Because walking is good for me.

Of course, the recycled showgirl part of me still isn’t convinced, sitting here this morning after staggering into bed last night as the result of an evening of warbling, crooning, and belting out the old familiar tunes whilst being bought lovely drinks by very kind and dear audience members… some of which drinks were made by the NEW bartender who doesn’t realize that one should pour 1 part absinthe to at least 2 parts of cold water thereby turning me into a tunnel-vision afflicted, blathering moron…

Where was I? Oh yes… Sitting here in the face that results from NOT taking off the mascara before collapsing on my pillow, with the tousled hair that might make one think I had FAR more fun overnight than I did (damn it)… I am at war with myself. Responsible/health-conscious Joy and Irresponsible/overindulgent-showgirl Joy. I think…

Yes.

I think Irresponsible/overindulgent-showgirl Joy is going to insist on punishing the Responsible/health-conscious Joy for the affront to comfort and self-indulgence a walk will create by making her take that walk completely un-fixed-up. Tousled hair, bleary leftover face, and all. And since both of these entities are a part of the altogether vain and too self conscious Joy, we’re all going to be appalled.

mmhm.

Only I could possibly find a way to both proudly improve myself and punish myself all at the same time.

Now I must go walk.

As soon as I finish my grapefruit and handful of walnuts.